Bonkgadwon is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, thoughtless whale.

Bonkgadwon created Asia three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bonkgadwon, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bonkgadwon, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Bonkgadwon's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Bonkgadwon's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not kill goats.

3. Always obey Bonkgadwon's priests.

4. Nematodes are not to be trusted.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.