Vontitgil is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, kind troll.

Vontitgil created light five million years ago.

If you believe in Vontitgil, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Vontitgil, it will make you grow a tail.

Vontitgil's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Vontitgil's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

4. Erect seven copper sculptures of Vontitgil on top of important buildings.

5. Never paint your legs yellow.