Canflamquam is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, self-assured toad.

Canflamquam created an up quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Canflamquam, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Canflamquam, he will manifest in front of you.

Canflamquam's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Canflamquam's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not speak about rice.

3. Never write about black holes.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Canflamquam.