Kikyokrak is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, stupid dolphin.

Kikyokrak created a down quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Kikyokrak, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Kikyokrak, it will turn you into a worm.

Kikyokrak's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Kikyokrak's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear gray.

2. Always help grasshopers.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Run away from black eagles, for they are unholy.

5. Fast once a month.