Barnmegbog is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, two-faced hippopotamus.

Barnmegbog created the world four million years ago.

If you believe in Barnmegbog, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Barnmegbog, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Barnmegbog's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Barnmegbog's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed melons to badgers while wearing purple shorts.

2. Never look at galaxies.

3. Never talk about snakes.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never go into yellow rooms.