Nulran is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, cheerful human.

Nulran created Africa six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nulran, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Nulran, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Nulran's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Nulran's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Do not drink water in brown rooms.

3. Do not dye your hair violet.

4. Never go into magenta rooms.

5. Feed all hungry rats.