Vigbiffig is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, competent hydra.

Vigbiffig created tapeworms seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Vigbiffig, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Vigbiffig, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Vigbiffig's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Vigbiffig's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump near horses.

2. Do not shave your back.

3. Hide from blue nematodes for they are unholy.

4. Do not drink water in green rooms.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.