Nilpop is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, strong guinea pig.

Nilpop created a quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Nilpop, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Nilpop, she will turn you into a mouse.

Nilpop's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Nilpop's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Always help horses in need.

3. Never eat peas.

4. Put Nilpop first in all things.

5. Never eat bark.