Kadarmpop is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, impressive gorilla.

Kadarmpop created Asia three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kadarmpop, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kadarmpop, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Kadarmpop's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Kadarmpop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always make sure there are no seals in a building before entering it.

4. Never sing near snakes.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.