Wadmutxem is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, intelligent hyena.

Wadmutxem created silver seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Wadmutxem, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Wadmutxem, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Wadmutxem's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Wadmutxem's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms fawn.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Wadmutxem loves porpoises, so they must be honoured.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not listen to music.