Lopdubfab is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, witless hyena.

Lopdubfab created the solar system three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lopdubfab, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Lopdubfab, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Lopdubfab's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Lopdubfab's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from red turtles for they are unholy.

2. Never think about amino acids.

3. Retreat if nine shrews approach from the west.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Lopdubfab on top of all buildings.