Vogbegget Haddindapwipvon is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, unfair mink.

Vogbegget Haddindapwipvon created the planet Earth two billion years ago.

If you believe in Vogbegget Haddindapwipvon, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Vogbegget Haddindapwipvon, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Vogbegget Haddindapwipvon's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Vogbegget Haddindapwipvon's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick great tits.

2. Run away from cyan grasshopers, for they are unholy.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Always treat whales with great respect.

5. Never wear pink hats.