Poptampark is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, thoughtless monkey.

Poptampark created vertebrates twelve years ago.

If you believe in Poptampark, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Poptampark, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Poptampark's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Poptampark's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Do not kill moths.

4. Do not wear zinc on your body.

5. Do not listen to music.