Vonknadkim is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, awe-inspiring crocodile.

Vonknadkim created the Sun seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonknadkim, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Vonknadkim, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Vonknadkim's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Vonknadkim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Always obey Vonknadkim's priests.

3. Always make sure there are no ducks in a room before entering it.

4. Never paint your legs violet.

5. Never bounce in holy places.