Dapwegbus is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, prudent hummingbird.

Dapwegbus created matter four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapwegbus, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Dapwegbus, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Dapwegbus' most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Dapwegbus' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Worship no other gods but Dapwegbus.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.