Wapnurtfen Kompogort is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, caring ferret.

Wapnurtfen Kompogort created the Andromeda Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Wapnurtfen Kompogort, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Wapnurtfen Kompogort, it will torture you forever.

Wapnurtfen Kompogort's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Wapnurtfen Kompogort's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Shrews are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never write about galaxies.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Wapnurtfen Kompogort.

5. Never play with disobedient children.