Gonniblip is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, thoughtless eagle.

Gonniblip created bats seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gonniblip, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Gonniblip, she will refuse to believe in you.

Gonniblip's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Gonniblip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

2. Feed all hungry moths.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gonniblip.

4. Capybaras are not to be trusted.

5. Never sing in the presence of snakes.