Mapbemsab is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, clever cobra.

Mapbemsab created the Cigar Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mapbemsab, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Mapbemsab, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Mapbemsab's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Mapbemsab's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about gravity.

2. Do not speak about aubergines.

3. Always wear turquoise.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Do not stand on grass.