Jadhigyakwat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, moody wombat.

Jadhigyakwat created Africa nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jadhigyakwat, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Jadhigyakwat, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Jadhigyakwat's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Jadhigyakwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick grasshopers.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Jadhigyakwat must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Jadhigyakwat on top of all buildings.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.