Ponwitgub is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, benevolent wren.

Ponwitgub created a charm quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ponwitgub, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ponwitgub, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Ponwitgub's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Ponwitgub's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from cyan dogs, for they are unholy.

2. Hide if three nematodes approach from the east.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never mention seals.

5. Never wear brown tights.