Tagweebed is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, cheerful zebra.

Tagweebed created humanity nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tagweebed, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Tagweebed, he will turn you into a rat.

Tagweebed's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Tagweebed's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sing in public.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Feed all hungry whales.

5. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.