Gudwadwik is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, compassionate cat.

Gudwadwik created the planet Mars two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gudwadwik, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Gudwadwik, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Gudwadwik's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Gudwadwik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never wear skirts.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.