Zakpanyart Yarlmatceb is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, happy horse.

Zakpanyart Yarlmatceb created the Virgo Supercluster seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Zakpanyart Yarlmatceb, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Zakpanyart Yarlmatceb, he will turn you into a sheep.

Zakpanyart Yarlmatceb's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Zakpanyart Yarlmatceb's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate badgers.

2. Do not kill goats.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Zakpanyart Yarlmatceb must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never think ill of sick dogs.