Tighadarm is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, vain finch.

Tighadarm created dark energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Tighadarm, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tighadarm, it will boil you in a big pot.

Tighadarm's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Tighadarm's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if eight nematodes approach from the west.

2. Never paint your back violet.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not drink alcohol.