Guptoftik Kopbassdad Tikdagmatlungattarbast is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, kind beaver.

Guptoftik Kopbassdad Tikdagmatlungattarbast created the universe three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Guptoftik Kopbassdad Tikdagmatlungattarbast, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Guptoftik Kopbassdad Tikdagmatlungattarbast, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Guptoftik Kopbassdad Tikdagmatlungattarbast's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Guptoftik Kopbassdad Tikdagmatlungattarbast's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Guptoftik Kopbassdad Tikdagmatlungattarbast must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never go into mauve rooms.

5. Guptoftik Kopbassdad Tikdagmatlungattarbast loves pigs, so they must be respected.