Getyakfid is a god.

It takes the form of a small, fussy pigeon.

Getyakfid created the Whirlpool Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Getyakfid, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Getyakfid, it will make you grow a tail.

Getyakfid's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Getyakfid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Getyakfid.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

5. Worship no other gods but Getyakfid.