Bapvidsan is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, tiresome beaver.

Bapvidsan created the solar system two years ago.

If you believe in Bapvidsan, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bapvidsan, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Bapvidsan's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Bapvidsan's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if nine geese approach from the south.

2. Erect seven titanium sculptures of Bapvidsan on top of important buildings.

3. Erect a large copper sculpture of Bapvidsan on top of all buildings.

4. Never skip near foxes.

5. Do not stand on grass.