Metbigtanwatxuc is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, awe-inspiring centaur.

Metbigtanwatxuc created snails two million years ago.

If you believe in Metbigtanwatxuc, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Metbigtanwatxuc, she will strike you with lightening.

Metbigtanwatxuc's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Metbigtanwatxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Metbigtanwatxuc loves snakes, so they must be respected.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Run away if six bats approach from the west.

5. Never pour water over plants.