Tomhonpop is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, resourceful naga.

Tomhonpop created the planet Earth five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tomhonpop, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tomhonpop, it will turn you into a mouse.

Tomhonpop's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Tomhonpop's Holy Commandments

1. Always help snails.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Always make sure there are no goats in a room before entering it.

4. Hide if nine squirrels approach from the north.

5. Tomhonpop must be the most important thing in your life.