Wat is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, moody owl.

Wat created humankind four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wat, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Wat, she will jump up and down on your head.

Wat's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Wat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moons.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

3. Put Wat first in all things.

4. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Wat on top of all buildings.

5. Goats are unholy and should not be approached.