Bossyogwig is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, ruthless wren.

Bossyogwig created light four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bossyogwig, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Bossyogwig, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Bossyogwig's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Bossyogwig's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never bounce in holy places.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not kill moths.

5. Always obey Bossyogwig's priests.