Nelgidbog is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, dishonourable fish.

Nelgidbog created a down quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nelgidbog, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Nelgidbog, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Nelgidbog's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Nelgidbog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Always help ducks.

4. Never paint your legs orange.

5. Hide if five tapirs approach from the south.