Wiggonwan is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, slow bat.

Wiggonwan created the Sun six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wiggonwan, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Wiggonwan, it will ignore you.

Wiggonwan's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Wiggonwan's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in holy places.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Wiggonwan.

3. Do not trade with those who eat wheat.

4. Always treat squirrels with great respect.

5. Hide from brown capybaras for they are unholy.