Nartgondoss is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, witty sheep.

Nartgondoss created the Milkyway four billion years ago.

If you believe in Nartgondoss, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Nartgondoss, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Nartgondoss' most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Nartgondoss' Holy Commandments

1. Nartgondoss loves squirrels, so they must be honoured.

2. Always obey Nartgondoss' priests.

3. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Erect six carbon sculptures of Nartgondoss on top of important buildings.