Flamtad is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, merciful capybara.

Flamtad created gold five billion years ago.

If you believe in Flamtad, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Flamtad, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Flamtad's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Flamtad's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Flamtad on top of all buildings.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Flamtad loves ducks, so they must be respected.

4. Never write about gravity.

5. You must love Flamtad.