Popfum is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, humane jaguar.

Popfum created time and space three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Popfum, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Popfum, it will boil you in a big pot.

Popfum's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Popfum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large lead sculpture of Popfum on top of all buildings.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never feed garlic to mites while wearing green shirts.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never think about planets.