Tingutbun is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, astonishing salamander.

Tingutbun created light four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tingutbun, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Tingutbun, she will not invite you to parties.

Tingutbun's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Tingutbun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

4. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.