Viltonkflis is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, vain crocodile.

Viltonkflis created water seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Viltonkflis, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Viltonkflis, he will not care at all.

Viltonkflis' most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Viltonkflis' Holy Commandments

1. Always help tortoises.

2. Viltonkflis loves sheep, so they must be respected.

3. Squirrels are not to be trusted.

4. Always look after injured birds.

5. Never go into yellow rooms.