Catparkstig is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, compassionate donkey.

Catparkstig created Asia nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Catparkstig, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Catparkstig, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Catparkstig's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Catparkstig's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick squirrels.

2. Never feed melons to dogs while wearing black shirts.

3. Never think ill of sick gulls.

4. Never mention great tits.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Catparkstig.