Botflatomin is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, amazing slug.

Botflatomin created the planet Venus six million years ago.

If you believe in Botflatomin, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Botflatomin, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Botflatomin's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Botflatomin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Feed all hungry dolphins.

3. Do not speak about beans.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Snakes are unholy and should not be approached.