Gepbastquathinbarnhun is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, benevolent goat.

Gepbastquathinbarnhun created the Large Magellanic Cloud seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gepbastquathinbarnhun, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gepbastquathinbarnhun, he will be mildly annoyed.

Gepbastquathinbarnhun's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Gepbastquathinbarnhun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair blue.

2. Run away from mauve bats, for they are unholy.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate snakes.

4. Put Gepbastquathinbarnhun first in all things.

5. Always wear white.