Fardanhon is a god.

He takes the form of a large, impressive raccoon.

Fardanhon created a Higgs boson three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fardanhon, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fardanhon, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Fardanhon's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Fardanhon's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate squirrels.

5. Do not chop down trees.