Flamdidjarn is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, merciful squid.

Flamdidjarn created a strange quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flamdidjarn, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Flamdidjarn, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Flamdidjarn's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Flamdidjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Never think about cell theory.

3. Never write about gravity.

4. Always obey Flamdidjarn's priests.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.