Wignurtjop is a god.

She takes the form of a large, generous toad.

Wignurtjop created gold two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wignurtjop, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Wignurtjop, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Wignurtjop's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Wignurtjop's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Wignurtjop.

4. Retreat if five dolphins approach from the north.

5. Respect your elders.