Gepgoffub is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, able horse.

Gepgoffub created the Andromeda Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Gepgoffub, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gepgoffub, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Gepgoffub's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Gepgoffub's Holy Commandments

1. Turtles are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Put Gepgoffub first in all things.

3. Erect nine nickel sculptures of Gepgoffub on top of important buildings.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always wear turquoise.