Mappinwan is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, staggering toad.

Mappinwan created the Milkyway four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mappinwan, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Mappinwan, it will boil you in a big pot.

Mappinwan's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Mappinwan's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Always treat geese with great respect.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Mappinwan.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Mappinwan.