Sigtarbad is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, overgenerous naga.

Sigtarbad created a quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Sigtarbad, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Sigtarbad, she will turn you into a puffin.

Sigtarbad's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Sigtarbad's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in holy places.

2. Pray towards the south.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never eat green fruit.