Tarflybug is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, awesome mouse.

Tarflybug created Europe three billion years ago.

If you believe in Tarflybug, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tarflybug, she will turn you into a rock.

Tarflybug's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Tarflybug's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not speak about beans.

4. You must love Tarflybug.

5. Always help frogs.