Appigrow Artzedbig is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, overgenerous dingo.

Appigrow Artzedbig created the planet Mars three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Appigrow Artzedbig, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Appigrow Artzedbig, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Appigrow Artzedbig's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Appigrow Artzedbig's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silver sculpture of Appigrow Artzedbig on top of all buildings.

2. Never talk about snails.

3. Do not hurt mice.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never look at planets.