Cudstigyam is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, thoughtless whale.

Cudstigyam created a quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cudstigyam, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cudstigyam, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Cudstigyam's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Cudstigyam's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Cudstigyam eight times a day.

2. Cudstigyam must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Cudstigyam loves sheep, so they must be respected.